Domestic violence—it’s not just a women’s issue!
For far too long, society has turned a blind eye to male victims. But here’s the shocking truth: men, too, face significant levels of domestic abuse. Let’s break down the six most common forms of domestic violence against men, uncovering the reality behind their silent suffering.
1. Physical Abuse: Bruised, Beaten, and Silent
When you think of domestic violence, physical abuse is probably what comes to mind first. But did you know men can be victims of severe physical assaults, too? We’re talking hitting, punching, kicking, and even weapon attacks! A shocking study by Kolbe and Büttner (2020) found that up to 20.3% of men have been physically abused by a partner.
But here’s the catch: society’s image of “tough men” keeps many silent. The stigma around male victimization is so strong that many men are afraid to speak up, fearing they’ll be seen as weak or unable to defend themselves (McHugh et al., 2013).
2. Emotional and Psychological Abuse: The Invisible Chains
It doesn’t leave physical scars, but emotional and psychological abuse can be just as devastating. We’re talking about verbal insults, manipulation, humiliation, and gaslighting—all tools abusers use to break down a victim’s sense of self-worth. It’s so subtle that many men don’t even realize they’re being abused!
In a study from South Africa, male victims reported suffering from emotional abuse alongside physical violence (Gateri et al., 2021). The damage this form of abuse causes can lead to long-term emotional trauma like anxiety, depression, and a shattered self-esteem.
3. Sexual Abuse: A Stigma No One Talks About
Brace yourself for one of the most underreported and stigmatized forms of abuse against men: sexual abuse. Yes, it happens—non-consensual sexual acts, coercion, and even sexual humiliation are inflicted on male victims (Northlake Behavioral Health, 2024).
The shame and isolation felt by men in these situations are almost unimaginable. Many don’t speak up, haunted by society’s taboos around male victimization. A study by Hines and Douglas (2015) revealed that male survivors face immense pressure to stay silent. The result? Untold trauma and emotional scars that linger for a lifetime.
4. Economic Abuse: Trapped by Finances
This one’s a sneaky form of control. Economic abuse happens when an abuser controls a victim’s financial resources, making it impossible for them to leave. Whether it’s restricting access to bank accounts, sabotaging job opportunities, or deciding how money is spent, economic abuse is all about financial dependency (Tsui, 2014). For many men, this form of abuse means staying trapped in a toxic relationship because they simply can’t afford to leave (Walker et al., 2019).
5. Coercive Control: The Power Game
It’s subtle but devastating—coercive control refers to an abuser’s attempt to dominate their victim through a pattern of manipulative behaviors. From isolating the victim from family and friends to constant monitoring and making threats, it’s all designed to keep the victim under the abuser’s thumb (Northlake Behavioral Health, 2024).
This kind of abuse chips away at a man’s autonomy, turning him into a prisoner in his own life, afraid to leave due to the fear that’s been instilled in him over time.
6. Verbal Abuse: Words That Cut Like Knives
Not all scars are physical—verbal abuse can cause just as much pain. Abusers use derogatory comments, name-calling, belittling, and threats to tear down their victim’s self-worth (Gateri et al., 2021). For men in abusive relationships, this type of abuse is especially damaging, leading to emotional distress and lasting psychological trauma.
Conclusion: It’s Time to Acknowledge Male Victims!
Domestic violence against men is real, and it comes in many forms—physical, emotional, sexual, economic, and beyond. The stigma surrounding male victimization and society’s outdated views of masculinity often prevent men from seeking help or speaking out about their experiences.
To truly combat domestic violence, we must foster an inclusive dialogue that recognizes the experiences of male victims and creates support systems that cater to their unique needs. Society must wake up and realize: domestic violence knows no gender. Everyone deserves a way out, and every survivor deserves support.
References
- Duffy et al., (2013). Evaluating the Role of Social Norms in Fostering Pro-Environmental Behaviors.
- Gateri, M., et al. (2021). A Cross-sectional Study of Gender-Based Violence Against Men: Prevalence and Risk Factors in South Africa.
- Hines, D.A., & Douglas, E.M. (2015). Intimate Partner Violence Among Men: A Review of the Literature.
- Huntley, K., et al. (2019). Masculine Norms and Violence: Implications for Male Victims.
- Kolbe, V., & Büttner, A. (2020). Domestic Violence Against Men—Prevalence and Risk Factors.
- McHugh, M., et al. (2013). What About the Men? A Critical Review of Men’s Experiences of Intimate Partner Violence.
- Morgan, R., & Wells, L. (2016). The Influence of Masculine Norms on Men’s Help-Seeking Behaviors.
- Swan et al. (2016). The Impact of Intimate Partner Violence on Men’s Mental Health: A Review.